I Was Hoping
by Bren99
Summary: LoganVeronica, set the summer after the finale.. She needed someone to talk to, he was more than willing to listen.


_When you get back home maybe you could stop by, maybe we could talk." _

"Yeah, I think that would be a good idea." 

Those had been some of the last words Logan had said to Veronica, as she left her internship to head back home. When she got home, they'd talk. They'd sit down like adults and talk about everything for once. 

Logan sat staring at his watch and frowned. He was almost positive Veronica wasn't going to show. By now the "Welcome Home" party he wasn't invited to was probably over. If he was right, the leftover cake had already been put away and her friends had already said their goodbyes. He was sure that the handmade sign her father had made was already neatly tucked away somewhere, and plastic plates and cups were tossed in the trashcan beside the kitchen counter.

He could imagine that about right now, Veronica was settled comfortably on her couch watching a cheesy movie with her father. Her thoughts weren't on him, or the conversations they had had over the last couple months. She was back from her internship and home with her father. Logan was sure that now, he was merely an afterthought.

_"Logan , are you sure you don't mind me calling?"_

"God Veronica, do you even have to ask that?"

"I just thought I might be bothering you."

"Have I hung up yet?"

"No but…"

"So how's the internship going?"

"Honestly?"

"No lie to me, Veronica. Yes honestly." 

She had called him unexpectedly one night, bored and just wanting to see how he was doing. They talked for hours about nothing at all, and for Logan it had been just what he needed. They had talked every night she had been gone after that. Sometimes he would call her. Other times, just when he had decided she wasn't going to call his phone would ring and he couldn't help but smile.

The conversations were always random. Sometimes they would talk about Lilly and laugh about all the trouble she had gotten them into. Once or twice, they talked about Duncan, and how no matter where he was, he was sure to be an amazing father.

It was almost nice to imagine what life would have been like if Lilly had lived. Never did they talk about what life really would have been like. They never spoke of Lilly's misdeeds, or if Veronica would still be with Duncan had Meg not died. Instead they talked about a dream world that they both knew never would have been.

_"Do you think Lilly would have been an actress?"_

"Veronica, Lilly was an actress."

"Yeah, but she could have totally made a career out of it."

"And Duncan would have been President."

"With Jake running the show." 

"And Miss Mars would have graduated from Stanford fulfilling her life long dream!"

"Ha, and what would you have been doing, Echolls?"

"Living it up as a professional bachelor."

"You're kidding , right?"

"You don't think the bachelor life is for me?"

"I think you have too much to offer to be a bachelor for the rest of your life." 

What they didn't talk about was their relationship, or lack thereof. Instead, they talked like friends, and at the same time there was always an awkward silence when it came to things that really mattered. Still he had hoped that when she came home things would change. That maybe she still cared. Maybe she still loved him, even just a little.

There had been times when he had wanted to apologize to her again for everything. Times when he thought that a few more 'I'm sorry's' would help, but at the same time he knew it was best not to remind her. There had been mistakes on both ends of their relationship and he wasn't sure if Veronica was ready to open up about it just yet.

_"So has everything been okay with you?"_

"Just peachy, V."

"No attempts on your life or anything?" 

"You mean has the mob put out a hit on me? Not that I know of."

"Just be careful, Logan." 

"Veronica Mars, is that concern I hear in your voice?" 

"Maybe just a little."

"I'll be careful, I promise."

"Good." 

The truth was, if they did stand a chance, they would both need to bend. The problem was Veronica Mars was not good at bending. She saw things one way, her way, and he wasn't sure if she would be willing to take a step to change. He knew he needed to be less protective, but she needed to own up to her problems, too. Still, if there was even a tiny chance for them, he'd gladly take it.

He never really tried to push things over the phone because he knew it would do no good. He knew he had to regain Veronica's trust, and if that meant taking baby steps he was more than willing to try it. Every conversation they had was part of the healing, and he knew how hard it was for Veronica to attempt to open up. Still, there were times when he couldn't help but ask questions that he needed answers to. 

_"So Mac stopped by today."_

"Oh? Are you two secretly BFF's now? Dick is going to be so jealous!"

"Are you sure you're not jealous?

"That you're trying to steal one of my best friends? Totally!"

"She said you and Piz broke up before you left…"

"Yeah. Wasn't working."

"I just assumed you broke up after you got to Virginia."

"No, it was before. So did I tell you I learned to sharpen pencils today? I think the boss digs my technique, too!"

"You do realize there's a joke in there that I'm actually willing to overlook today.. ." 

Logan had enjoyed being the person Veronica had turned to while she was away. He had loved every conversation. He had even enjoyed the ones that ended weird for them, because it was progress for the forgiveness he was seeking. There had been times when she had shared secrets with him, little morsels from her life as an intern, and something about Veronica Mars opening up to him made him feel hopeful.

_"I'm not sure the FBI is for me."_

"Too many rules and regulations?"

"Yeah, well that's part of it." 

"I know it's not because it's dangerous."

"I'm just not a by the book kind of gal."

"You wouldn't be Veronica Mars if you were." 

Logan stood and let out a loud sigh. Sometimes he didn't know why he kept being pulled back in by Veronica. It wasn't as if he wanted to love her, he just couldn't help himself. She was a part of him, part of who he was now and he couldn't make that go away. He was in love with a woman that loved chasing the wind, and all he could do was sit back and hope that one day she found her way back to him.

He knew that over the years, they had both changed, but he still loved her. In his heart he was sure that he would always love her, and that scared him as much as it thrilled him. Now, if she would just call he'd know where he stood. He needed closure. No matter what that meant, he needed to figure out what was going to happen with the spitfire he loved so much.

_"I got my hair cut today."_

"Should I alert the media?" 

"Like it was in high school. You know, short." 

"And what exactly brought that on?"

"This Barney Fyffe look alike has been telling me I'm as cute as a bug for a week now, so I got tired of it."  
"And you chopped all your hair off?"

"Well it's not jagged or anything, but it has attitude."

"Can't wait to see it." 

"So you can make fun of it until it grows back out?" 

"No, because I'm sure it looks great." 

Logan loved something about every side of Veronica. He had watched her grow up, change from innocent and trusting, to guarded and strong. He had seen her at her lowest and stood by her during some of the hardest moments of her life. He had admired the fighter, but feared for the girl that never backed down. More than anything, he adored her gentleness when they were alone and in love. The sweet, caring Veronica, the one that held him when he cried and kissed his cheek when he needed it most, that was the Veronica that he would spend his life loving.

_"How much of a girl would I be if I told you I missed my dad?"_

"Of course you miss him."

"I miss Backup, too." 

"I'm sure they're both going crazy without you." 

"At least this is almost over."

"Not the experience of a life time you were hoping for?"

"Not even close."

"I'm really sorry it didn't turn out like you hoped."

"Yeah, but you know I think I'm okay with that."

"I'm glad. All I want is for you to be happy." 

Logan knew it was a long shot, but all he wanted was another chance with Veronica. 'This time though,' he reasoned as he paced back and forth, 'it would be different.' Not that he actually foresaw another chance. But if, if it happened, he would sit down with Veronica and they would talk like adults. He let out a laugh at the thought, because he wasn't even sure Veronica had forgiven him for beating up Piz much less sleeping with Madison. Maybe she had only called him because there was no one else. With his luck he would never have another shot with Veronica Mars.

_"So, I heard from Mac that my dad is throwing a welcome home party for me."_

"Yeah. I heard."

"Oh? So you got an invite then?"  
"No, Corny told me when he delivered my pizza yesterday."

"Wait, how did Corny know?"

"Apparently your father invited everyone but me."

"Oh."

"Did you really think your dad would ask little ole' me to the shindig?"

"I thought maybe Mac had got ten you on the list?"

"She told me to come, but you know with your dad not wanting me there…" 

"My father doesn't hate you, Logan."

"He just doesn't love me like he did Piz?"

"Did I tell you I got complimented on my coffee today? How awesome am I?" 

Running a hand through his hair Logan frowned, resisting the urge to drink his problems away. Instead, he walked back over to the sofa and fell against it with a thud. He closed his eyes and swallowed hard just as he heard a tap at his door. He opened his eyes and jumped from the sofa and to his feet. When he got to the door he sucked in a deep breath before he turned the knob slowly.

He felt a surge of relief fill his body when the door opened and he saw his Veronica standing in front of him. When he looked at her, at her short hair and nervous smile, he remembered the girl he first fell in love with. He watched as she dug her hands into her pockets and stared up at him intently. He saw fear in her eyes, but there was also a hint of hope. 

Logan stood frozen in place waiting for Veronica to say something, make some sort of move. Finally, she bit her lip nervously and then forced a tiny smile.

Looking down at her, he smiled back and took a step out the door. She eyed him for a moment before closing the space between them. Letting out a nervous breath, he pulled her to him and for the first time since he opened the door, Logan finally spoke.

"I was hoping it would be you." .


End file.
